"Cael came home from school today wearing two pairs of underpants, and he claims he went to school with none. Thoughts?"
I've found that the best weapon to combat the "shock and awe" of motherhood is liquor, but when that's not available, I like to fall back on sarcasm and a sense of humor. That being said, would you like to hear something funny?
I was blessed with the two wildest, wackiest, messiest, cutest, and often mischievous boys a girl could ask for. And with my goofy husband rounding out this gang of misfits, I was seriously outnumbered. So what did I do? Had another baby boy.
Pray for me.
Meet Joel. Joel is our resident jack-of-all-trades, working what feels like 18 jobs to support us all and sustain my blogging and Diet Dr. Pepper habits. Joel is a guy's guy; he loves fishing, hunting, bourbon and any other activity that I find disgusting or otherwise unappealing. You know, opposites attract and all that.
Despite the fact that we have very different interests, we share a love for sushi, Netflix binging, entertaining our friends and family and no-holds-barred sock war battles with our sons on the family room floor.
Unfortunately, Cael has always had a knack for saying the wrong thing at exactly the wrong time. In fact, if it weren't for his extremely inquisitive and often inappropriate commentary on life, I never would have started this blog. I'd also have fewer gray hairs and a greater will to live, but who needs those things anyway?
Say hello to Graham. With a much gentler nature than his older brother, Graham can most often be found, thumb in mouth, curled up with a book or wedged between the couch cushions where he was shoved as Cael attempted a quadruple gainer onto a pile of shredded newspaper and matchbox cars.
But don't let Graham fool you. Behind those pretty blue eyes and inexplicable straight hair is a politician in the making. The way he weasels two cookies out of me is truly appalling. If only his other productions were so romantic.
Adler is the littlest Foreman with the loudest voice. After Graham was born, I struggled for many years with the decision to have more kids, and now that my little "Cashew" is here, I am quite confident we made the right call.
Adler has changed us all for the better; Cael and Graham are more territorial and adept at constructing Lego booby traps, Joel is even more overworked, and the pieces of dirty laundry in my house now outnumber all of the grains of sand on the earth.
But look at him! Yes, definitely a good decision.
Most of us, that is.
